Many hurdles face relatives-turned-parents

It is not that unusual for grandparents to have a greater role in raising children than we picture in an "ideal family". I think that this "non-traditional" family arrangement is actually the normal and natural setup. The two-parent and child socially independent and self sufficient family is something created in modern times to suit the economic system that requires workers to be movable to follow the job.

All of our problems about "balancing" family and job, the one career and two career problem, child care, etc. are not personal problems to be solved by individuals, they are social problems created by our economic system that can only be solved by the system, not the families.

Many hurdles face relatives-turned-parents - The Charleston Gazette :

"How did the Nate come to live with his grandparents?

When Rachel became pregnant at age 21, she was a sophomore at Marshall University. A series of tragic events, including a car accident, money from a lawsuit and an abundance of prescription painkillers, led Rachel to realize she couldn't stay with Nate's father and she couldn't raise her child without help.

'The No. 1 reason a child is being raised by relatives, nationwide, is substance abuse,' Rachel said. 'At 23, I was still living with Nate's birth father.'

She said the situation went from bad to worse.

'I decided to get help with a drug addiction. It's not always been a bowl full of cherries,' Rachel said. 'I thought I would go to rehab, then go back and get Nate. But it often takes more.'

At this point, Nila and Howard became Nate's legal guardians.

'I can love my daughter as much as anyone else, but I don't have to like what she is doing,' Nila said. 'The hardest day was when I had to stop worrying about what was best for my daughter and worry about my grandson.'"